Showing posts with label ninja teacher. Show all posts
Showing posts with label ninja teacher. Show all posts

Sunday, November 13, 2011

5 Things We Wish We Didn't Have To Whine About

For those of you who care, my ankle now shows a wide blend of CMYK colors and  appears now only to be roughly twice the size of my other ankle. (You can read about the entire forlorn tale here.)

And since my right ankle still hurts like the dickens, I've had more than just a tad bit of trouble being my normal chipper, funny, quirky self.

Yeah, I'm pretty sure you find all of that hard to believe.
Having a big, fat ugly boot hasn't helped my sunny disposition either--although it has given rise to certain fantasies involving kickboxing certain people through walls like a Ninja fighter.

But that probably wouldn't bode well for Ninja teacher or that whole flying under the radar thing. In fact, kickboxing certain people through walls like a Ninja fighter would probably put Ninja teacher smack dab on someone's radar.

And I'm thinking it's probably a radar we don't want to be on. No siree, Missy.

So since this ankle injury has relegated me to couch potato status, I've had time to think about things. And we all know how I feel about those darn tootin' things. And, of course, when I think about those darn tootin' things, I whine. And since this has more or less been a no-whining blog since its creation in 2007, perhaps now is a good time to come up with a list of  5 Things Teachers Wished They Didn't Have To Whine About.

How about a festive drum roll pah-leese…

5 Things Teachers Wished 
They Didn't Have To Whine About

No. 5… Printing out grade validation sheets even though grades from sea to shining sea are entered on computers and stored on servers and backed up onto other servers hidden somewhere in the Rocky Mountains. Wasn't all this technology stuff suppose to save us time, money and trees?

No. 4… Being told from fields of amber waves of grain to those purple mountain majesties that we are using entirely too much copy paper printing out stuff. Hmmmm wonder if that has anything to do with No. 5?

No. 3… Assisting PBs (as in Powers That Be) with their new technology gizmos even though we don't have those gizmos, but would like to have those gizmos, and maybe have even requested those gizmos, but alas, there is no money for those gizmos for the lower case pb's (as in peons that be).  

No. 2… Having to embrace newfangled technology, software or trendy new educational panaceas that are suppose to save us time, but actually add time.

No. 1… Stories that claim that teachers are overpaid. I'm not exactly sure where these teachers work or what school districts employ them. And, I'm not sure exactly how many hours they log in. What I do know is that they obviously haven't taken a peak at my paycheck or yours either.

It's enough to make you want to kickbox certain people through walls like a Ninja fighter.

But then that probably would put Ninja teacher smack dab on that radar.

And that, my fellow lowercase pb's, would be a very, very bad thing indeed.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Teacher Spirit Week

This week marks Homecoming Week at our school. Yes, another fun-filled extravaganza. Can't you just feel the excitement?

Yeah, I thought so. 

Each day this week is designated as a specific dress up day with a specific phase. Monday is Twin Day (Make 'Em See Double), Tuesday is Decade Day (Turn back the clock on the Indians), Wednesday is Super Hero Day (Show 'Em Who's Boss), Thursday is Favorite Team Jersey Day (The Warriors Can't Compete) and Friday is Panther Spirit Day (Make them see Black & Blue).

Well, all of that got me to thinking about how we could have our own little teacher dress up week complete with catchy little phrases. You don't even have to completely dress up for this. All you have to do is print out little stickers and wear them. It'll be our little secret.
Monday…Super Star Day Sticker

We could call it Teacher Spirit Week. It would go something like this…

Tuesday… Stupid Head Day
Monday… is Super Star Day
Grab one of those stinky starfish and toss 'em back. Yep, we're saving public education one stinker at a time.


Tuesday… is Big Fat Stupid Head Day
Highlight one educational policy/politician/bureaucrat that pushes an agenda that doesn't work. (I bet you can't pick just one.) On this day only, you have a free pass to say "Big Fat Stupid Head" all day and it won't stop my little timer. (Check out the counter on the right side of this blog.)
Wednesday… Double Trouble Bubbles Day

Wednesday… is Double Trouble Bubbles

Concentrate on just one thing that pops into the bubble above your head today. Repeat it like a silent mantra, and if it won't get you fired, actually say the bubble above your head just once. I bet you'll feel better.

Thursday… ECD Day
Thursday… is ECD Day–Emergency Chocolate Day
Bring some chocolate goodness to school and share it with a colleague or two. I bet you single handedly improve staff morale 110 percent.

Friday… Ninja Day
Friday… is Ninja Day
Today you'll actually have to semi-dress the part. Wear all black. Slap on your sticker and start your day saying, "I am Ninja Teacher. You can't see me. I fly under the radar. I am better, faster and smarter than you. When I shut my classroom door, the magic happens."



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Don't forget the next edition of the Education Buzz–Life's a Carnival will appear here Wednesday, Sept. 28. Please submit your posts no later than Saturday, Sept. 24 by 5 p.m. CDT. Use this handy dandy form for your submissions.

Sunday, September 11, 2011

Picture Day, The Screen & The Witch, Oh My!

I survived Picture Day.

Which, for those of you yearbook types, know was something just short of a miracle.

And which, for those of you non-yearbook types (but fans of this blog), know for me was probably a miracle of sorts necessitating divine intervention.

Even Mother Teresa would have found Picture Day trying.

It certainly tested my resolve to remain Ninja Teacher.

I almost set my hair on fire and ran out of the building when I arrived at 6:30 in the morning and saw the gigantic screen hanging from the auditorium stage.

You know, the stage that roughly 2,000 children, faculty and staff needed to navigate across to get their school pictures made.

Yeah, that stage. The one that was blocked by the giant screen hanging down. The screen that rivaled the dimensions of the green screen in the Wizard of Oz.

Yep, the screen that needed a special password code and either a Phd in technology or some sort of divine intervention in order to raise it. Yeah, that screen.

It took almost two hours before The Screen was raised because apparently only one person knows the super-secret instructions on how to do it.

During that two hour time period, I sort of felt like the witch in the Wizard of Oz. I'm fairly certain I probably acted a bit like the witch in the Wizard of Oz. And, I think it's a safe bet that I may have even looked like the witch in the Wizard of Oz.

And just in case you were wondering, I'm not talking about the good witch either.

Friday, September 9, 2011

Thought for the day…

It's hard to be Ninja Teacher and fly under the radar when people keep taking shots under the clouds.