The Simple Life, Tasty Shrimp & Warning Flags

I’m sure everyone missed me something terrible while I sat on the warm sands, listening to the soothing waves of the Gulf of Mexico while actually reading from the stack of books I’ve been accumulating all year long.

I sure hated to leave the Island (South Padre Island for you non-native types). I love living a life where the only major decision is whether to boil the fresh shrimp or cook them Barefoot Contessa style and the only crisis centers around who used up all the SPF 45 sunscreen leaving only a can of 30 SPF.

Ah, if life were so simple throughout the school year.

I also love the kind of life where you can peak out from your fifth floor balcony and get a heads up on what kind of day you’ll encounter just by gazing on either side to see what color flag is flying… Red for dangerous currents, Yellow for calm to moderate waters (although there’s this clever little notation that just because the waters are calm “does not mean safe water”--Jeez Louise). And, the last one and my least favorite one–Blue for “venemous marine life.”

Now even though I promised myself not to think too much on this trip, all that flag flapping got me to thinking--I know, I know, not necessarily a good thing--but nonetheless, I got to thinking about how maybe, just maybe, I should create and implement my own Flag Advisory System. You know, just to give the kiddos a heads-up on the kind of day in store for them. Besides, I think it would fit in rather nicely with my Code K warning system. So here’s my idea, let me know yours.

The Richie Flag Advisory System

Red Flag…Unless your hair is on fire, you best just sit down and hope for the best. This is a don’t-mess-with-me-day-or-we-may-just-pull-your- liver-out-your-nose kind of day.


Yellow Flag…Things are about as “normal” as they possibly can be, but just like at the beach, calm and normal doesn’t necessarily guarantee safe.

Blue Flag…We’re all feeling a bit snarky in here. Be prepared for sharp-witted and possibly stinking remarks.


I have a bad feeling, though, that the red and blue flags will fly repeatedly and probably simultaneously.